sweet sundays: the path less taken

Sometimes our baser human instincts take over in emotional situations and we react poorly. I hate when I overreact and have to backtrack, and apologize or I feel bad like if I saw the person at church or work or they turned out to be a family friend I'd be embarrassed. I'd much rather do it right the first time but since I'm not perfect, that does not always happen. When it does, I feel so much better about myself. There's an important lesson in knowing we don't have to be rude or crass to stand up for ourselves.

Something that happened last week reminded me of this. It's a Raf story. He doesn't want his pics on here but at least I can blog about him lol. For months he'd trained with this company for a position that he's wanted for sometime now. Finally, the training was completed and he began to work with the company. At the outset he explained that although he is willing to come in on Sundays, he would not be avail to work every Sunday. This is totally fair since he works Mondays-Fridays. In addition, it isn't required to come in on Sundays. However, one of the supervisors (a particularly rude one too that consistently gives employees grief) decided that he'd disregard that and every Sunday, he calls Raf. Oh, and even though Raf's requested less work on Sunday so he can get home at a decent time, he's been working past sunset on Sundays, then heading in early the next morn. Last Sunday, Raf decides he isn't going in. He's had a number of 6 day work-weeks in a row and needs a break. So as a courtesy (not required) he calls on Friday to inform them he's not available on Sunday. The particularly rude supervisor passes the phone to a colleague because how dare Raf not come in on Sunday when there's work to be done? The colleague is pleading for Raf come in but Raf can hear the other supervisor in the back ground complaining in a very argumentative manner that he MUST come in, he HAS to come in. Threatening, yes? I think so too.

Now, do I need to tell you about Caribbean males? Let me not stereotype widely. Jamaican men are VERY proud, and they don't take being disregarded or disrespected lightly. It would not be a stretch for Raf to put him in his place. Trust me. He can be rough...well, used to be. But he wasn't and I am so proud of him. What he did was drop off the equipment and company vehicle, call the administrator, and respectfully leave the position (she didn't want him to go but he explained the situation completely). Come Monday, he is being called repeatedly by said supervisor. When he finally speaks to him, supervisor apologetically asks him what happened and if there's anything they can do (yeaaa, act like you don't know). When Raf says no because he can't seem to have a decent conversation without being talked down to (even tho Raf's complained of this before). Supervisor's like "you know you can talk to me" and basically begs him to come back in so they can work out any differences amicably and with respect. So, Raf is back on the job. Supervisor is now mindful of his manner when dealing with Raf (if not other employees - can't expect too much now). & as usual Raf has a 100% IVR (ranking/rating system). Go babes!

Sometimes, people make it so hard for us to exhibit character traits that are attractive. They just push us to respond with our baser instincts. But thank God, sometimes, we hold on to our temper and take the higher road.

Be gone bad-man-isms! Be gone probably-you-neva-heard-a-mi!

I say choose the path less taken this week & the rest of your life...sometimes the results may not be desirable but if you walk away with your character intact, then what did you lose? Nada :) You in fact gained a world of dignity, self respect, and the admiration of those around you.

girly fridays: 15 lbs to get rid of

& I'd love to rid myself of them before June....remember that swimsuit?

Well my pal, Vicky and I were supposed to be making plans to lose some weight but "stuff" keeps coming up - yea, we're likely unconsciously avoiding. Well, the time has come. Finals are done next week and come May 3rd, it is ON. Weight is a funny issue. There are people saying I don't need to lose more but ahmmm, yes I do. I don't obsess about my weight and if I seem to, it's not genuine. I just wanna be down to a comfortable weight so I can maintain. I'm tired of trying to lose weight.

So what's my plan?

>>Exercising/gym 3 times per week, every week

>>Drinking water

>>Portion control

>>Healthy snacks in between to prevent starvation eating (a.k.a. overeating) lol

So ladies, what's your summer weight loss plan? I know there are some lucky ladies who don't need a weight loss plan but I'm not one of them.

Who's smokin the strong stuff today? Keri

This is a funny one. Short & sweet. I'm putting my friend (more of a sis) Keri on blast.

Here's the story. Yesterday she had a presentation in one of her rotations (she's in med school). 20 minutes long & graded by her attending. Now tell me why she see's the attending snoozing during her presentation, and says "we can ask Dr. B if he wakes up." LOVE IT. She called out the professor/attending grading her! She now thinks she's gonna fail, of course. I beg to differ. She's crazy, yes (it's def the green stuff she's smoking) but he can't fail her (or even near)...he didn't even hear all she said!

Thank you Keri, though I think you are nuts, THANK YOU for saying exactly what was on your mind. Sometimes, it just needs to be said. LOL!

word love: Dis Poem

dis poem

shall speak of the wretched sea

that washed ships to these shores

of mothers crying for their young

swallowed up by the sea

dis poem shall say nothing new

dis poem shall speak of time

time unlimited time undefined

dis poem shall call names

names like lumumba keyatta nkrumah

hannibal akenaton malcolm garvey

haile selassie

dis poem is vexed about apartheid racism fascism

the klu klux klan riots in brixton atlanta

jim jones

dis poem is revolting against 1st world 2nd world 3rd world division

man made decision

dis poem is like all the rest

dis poem will not be amongst great literary works

will not be recited by poetry enthusiasts

will not be quoted by politicians nor men of religion

dis poem is knives bombs guns blood fire

blazin for freedom

yes dis poem is a drum

ashanti mau mau ibo yoruba nyahbingi warriors

uhuru uhuru

namibia uhuru

uhuru soweto

uhuru afrika

dis poem will not change things

dis poem need to be changed

dis poem is a rebirth of a people

arizin awaking understandin

dis poem speak is speakin have spoken

dis poem shall continue even when poets have stopped writin

dis poem shall survive u me it shall linger in history

in your mind

in time forever

dis poem is time only time will tell

dis poem is still not written

dis poem has no poet

dis poem is just a part of the story

his-story her-story our-story still untold

dis poem is now ringin takin imitatin

makin u want to stop it

but dis poem will not stop

dis poem is long cannot be short

dis poem cannot be tamed cannot be blamed

the story is still not told about dis poem

dis poem is old new

dis poem was copied from the bible your prayer book

playboy magazine the ny times readers digest

the c.i.a. files the k.g.b. files

dis poem is no secret

dis poem shall be called boring stupid senseless

dis poem is watchin u tryin to make sense from dis poem

dis poem is messin up your brains

makin u want to stop listenin to dis poem

u need to know what will be said next in dis poem

dis poem shall disappoint u

beacuse

dis poem is to be continued

in your mind

in your mind

in your mind

by: Mutabaruka (Jamaican, 1952-)

Howard Drive Chronicles Part III

So me and crazy neighbor haven't been getting on any better.

Then Sunday happened and now I "owe" her ::long sigh::

We left Hugh home with our lone set of apt keys (yea, bad idea to have only one set) to go run errands. We were out for a few hours. But I called him about 45 minutes before I got home and spoke to him. All is well. When we finally get home and need him to open the door, would he pick up phone or answer doorbell?????? I called and called and called then buzzed and buzzed and buzzed. Nothing. So Raf heads around back to throw a stone up (yes, desperation set in after about 10 full ring phone calls) and I keep at my calling and buzzing.

Door opens. It's the neighbor. Great. She let's me in and get it, I ask her to bang on the ceiling to rouse my brother ::dies:: Anyway, he finally hears something (stone or banging on door) and opens the door before neighbor can bang. He was in the shower. Clearly having a spa day/moment. So, I graciously thank neighbor (what's a girl to do?).

So I'm telling K the story and I'm all like, great, now I owe my neighbor or something (I vote for something). K gladly reminds me it won't be long until she doesn't something nutty again. Then we can call it even. I'm actually looking forward to the next ceiling bang (not really).

sweet sundays: growing older

This weekend we celebrated Keri's birthday. She's all of 27 (yes, I put her on blast...she doesn't look it so she won't mind). We went to church, then had lunch, and then followed that up with a visit to a club. Yes, a club. Does that make any sense:? None at all, & since I'm a sensible girl, it won't happen again. I mean, it's about time I walk the walk, huh? Well, it wasn't supposed to be a club but it turned out to be one and what was I to do? Just say no :) But it's my LeeLee (soft spot). Anyhoo, we had fun hanging with each other (& can I insert some sop here? I'm glad my hussy's my dance partner for life - nothing makes a woman feel better than a sweet guy and he was oh, so sweet yesterday and last night. K, so back to regularly scheduled program). It was a bunch of her friends from high school, college, and med school. She looked hot, she had fun, and that's what matters at the moment. Oh! & she looked fab doing it!

I wish you could see the shoes but alas, such is life.

What's so good about growing older? Each day we grow older is a blessing...some people stay young (a.k.a. don't age. a.k.a. die). What's even better? Growing older as friends.

Happy Birthday my darling friend & sister

girly fridays: wish list items

Bel Kai Designs

Isn't it cute? *swoon*

Anyhoo...I'm off doing VERY girly stuff today. I'm off to court! I was called to jury duty. Let's see if they keep me or send me home. I'm very excited to be carrying out my civic duty :)

word love: divine strength

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."

Isaiah 40:31, KJV

Thank you, Andrew M. Manis

reblogged a.k.a. stolen

‘When are WE going to get over it?’

For much of the last forty years, ever since America “fixed” its race problem in the Civil Rights and Voting Rights Acts, we white people have been impatient with African Americans who continued to blame race for their difficulties. Often we have heard whites ask, “When are African Americans finally going to get over it?” Now I want to ask: When are we White Americans going to get over our ridiculous obsession with skin color?

Recent reports that “Election Spurs Hundreds of Race Threats, Crimes” should frighten and infuriate every one of us. Having grown up in “Bombingham,” Alabama in the 1960s, I remember overhearing an avalanche of comments about what many white classmates and their parents wanted to do to John and Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King. Eventually, as you may recall, in all three cases, someone decided to do more than “talk the talk.”

Since our recent presidential election, to our eternal shame we are once again hearing the same reprehensible talk I remember from my boyhood. We white people have controlled political life in the disunited colonies and United States for some 400 years on this continent. Conservative whites have been in power 28 of the last 40 years. Even during the eight Clinton years, conservatives in Congress blocked most of his agenda and pulled him to the right. Yet never in that period did I read any headlines suggesting that anyone was calling for the assassinations of presidents Nixon, Ford, Reagan, or either of the Bushes. Criticize them, yes. Call for their impeachment, perhaps. But there were no bounties on their heads. And even when someone did try to kill Ronald Reagan, the perpetrator was non-political mental case who wanted merely to impress Jody Foster. But elect a liberal who happens to be Black and we’re back in the sixties again.

At this point in our history, we should be proud that we’ve proven what conservatives are always saying — that in America anything is possible, EVEN electing a black man as president. But instead we now hear that school children from Maine to California are talking about wanting to “assassinate Obama.” Fighting the urge to throw up, I can only ask, “How long?”

How long before we white people realize we can’t make our nation, much less the whole world, look like us? How long until we white people can – once and for all – get over this hell-conceived preoccupation with skin color? How long until we white people get over the demonic conviction that white skin makes us superior? How long before we white people get over our bitter resentments about being demoted to the status of equality with non-whites? How long before we get over our expectations that we should be at the head of the line merely because of our white skin? How long until we white people end our silence and call out our peers when they share the latest racist jokes in the privacy of our white-only conversations?

I believe in free speech, but how long until we white people start making racist loudmouths as socially uncomfortable as we do flag burners? How long until we white people will stop insisting that blacks exercise personal responsibility, build strong families, educate themselves enough to edit the Harvard Law Review, and work hard enough to become President of the United States, only to threaten to assassinate them when they do?

How long before we start “living out the true meaning” of our creeds, both civil and religious, that all men and women are created equal and that “red and yellow, black and white” all are precious in God’s sight? Until this past November 4, I didn’t believe this country would ever elect an African American to the presidency. I still don’t believe I’ll live long enough to see us white people get over our racism problem. But here’s my three-point plan:

First, everyday that Barack Obama lives in the White House that black slaves built, I’m going to pray that God (and the Secret Service) will protect him and his family from us white people.

Second, I’m going to report to the FBI any white person I overhear saying, in seriousness or in jest, anything of a threatening nature about President Obama.

Third, I’m going to pray to live long enough to see America surprise the world once again, when white people can “in spirit and in truth” sing of our damnable color prejudice, ”We HAVE overcome.”

-Andrew M. Manis via The Macon Telegraph

sweet tooth? here's some eye candy

sweet sundays: no more negative Nellie

No matter how positive I am most times, it's funny how I can be the hardest and most negative about the people closest to me. I think sometimes we judge our parents, partners, children, and even ourselves too harshly. Yes, there are things we all need to work on but come on, most of us are pretty good people.

I sat down 2 weeks ago reading a blog written by a single lady immediately proceeding her divorce and as I read the piece I realized I never had to give up any dream when I married. Yes, there is compromise and I'm no professional married person (only 3 years in) but I think I've had my fair share of marital woes. However, this should never prevent me from seeing the great things about my spouse. As a seemingly professional student, I can say I've never been discouraged from pursuing whichever academic program was in my sights. I can just imagine how at odds that would be with my viewpoint on the importance of education. I'm still getting my potential successfulness on :) Also, I attend a seventh-day adventist church and have all my life. However, I'm not a traditional seventh-day adventist...I actually consider myself a plain ole Christian (trust me, this is revolutionary to some in my church). Nothing more. I'm a follower of Christ. I'm sure there are a lot of SDAs who would look at my nail polish and pierced ears askance. Further, some of my eating choices leave plenty to be desired in terms of SDA eating standards. Trust me, a traditional SDA Christian couldn't live with me, lol, but thank goodness he never tries to discourage me and allows me to express my spirituality in a way that is true to me.

Do you miss the brightness in life by allowing the negative and trouble spots to cloud your vision? Make an effort this week to think of the good and positive in those around you. It will increase your appreciation for those around you and brighten your week. It may not be easy but you won't regret it!

Next step? Learning to forgive those who hurt us...but small steps, people, small steps.

word love: Sidewalk

the footsteps outside,

they sound like heels.

six floors below,

pounding out the sound

of a woman determined.

determined to do

what, i don't know

but she sounds like

she's walking away from something.

before tonight i'd

never realized that the sound

of a woman's shoes on

a cobblestone sidewalk

could tell me

so much.

by: Matt Logelin (poet & blogger)

Who's smokin the strong stuff today? Spirit

Spirit Airlines must be high and completely out of it.

They will now be charging customers for carry on luggage. Yea, carry on. The CEO claims it is to give the customer more choices. Now we, the consumer (I should change that because I will never know what it is to fly Spirit now) can do what's best for us *spits up water* Yea, because before we weren't sure what to do with our carry on luggage. Now that we have to pay for it, we'll definitely have more choice. Follow his logic? No? Me either.

Good thing is we still get to put stuff under the seat in front of us for free. For now. Oh! & to tickle your fancy you can bring an umbrella for freeeeeeeee! Baby luggage is still free (strollers, car seats, and diaper bags). Of course, only one of those things ever gets placed in the overhead compartment but whatever.

I can't wait to see what's next. Not.

Source: Check this.

Reactions? Check this.

-Thanks Ren for the heads up. You know what will get my goat.

Howard Drive Chronicles Part II

Remember my downstairs neighbor? Well she seems to be getting to a lot of people.

Easter Sunday my bro and I are walking in from the laundry mat when we see this guy standing on the steps that lead to our door (There are 2 doors there - one for us and crazy neighbor, and one for the apartment beside us upstairs or the one beside my crazy downstairs neighbor). We assume he's from one of the apartments beside us. He says hi so we smile and say hi in response. Then he says, "your downstairs neighbor is driving me crazy." So I say, "I'm not surprised." I'm thinking she yelled at him or threatened to call the cops or something. She seems to like to do that. Then he goes, "she's my son's mother." Oh. Uncomfortable pause and side glance at the bro. He then says, "she makes me so mad sometimes I just wanna kill her." OH! I say, "you shouldn't let her get to you...enjoy your day." I grab for keys to open my apartment door now (Can you imagine keys wouldn't come out of the darn front door?? I do not want to be a witness). He steps back into my line of vision and goes, "she ruined my Easter service high"...guess he just got in from church. So I say, "don't let her do that...just have a good day anyhow."

Later I'm sharing the story with Raf and he tells me the guy lives right beside the crazy neighbor and he just thought she was babysitting his son. I'm like, nope. She's the mother of his son. & he really doesn't seem to get along with her. Here's to hoping they stay on each other's right side. Cause I don't need any drama under our apartment.

Howard Drive Chronicles Part I

For now this only has 2 installations. Here's the first.

So there's an elderly lady (early 70s maybe) who lives in the apartment across the parking lot entrance from me (that wasn't helpful lol - she's on one side of the drive, and I'm on the other). The first night I moved in I was trying to park but was unable to drive in because her date was dropping her off and they were necking in the car. YUP! Kissing, caressing, and all! And for so long that I gave up waiting. I don't know why I didn't blow my horn...it was late, and I felt like these 70 year olds kinda deserved their time I guess haha. It was one of those odd moments when you're happy their still young at heart and dating but a tad grossed out because omigoodness, they're 70. So I parked out in front.

Since then I've probably seen them one other time. Saturday, my friends and I are getting lunch ready when I look out and the gentleman has come to pick up his date. When he stepped out to wait for her, he was rocking one of those shirts, flowy with the top buttons open, his gold chain, & a little chest hair action. My friends were in awe. They couldn't fathom that he actually came to pick up my neighbor for a date (& that they were pretty involved) because he was so elderly till they saw my neighbor come out in a cute tee (I promise you I have one just like it) and pants, greet her gentleman caller, and drive off with him. We were all giggling and saying we now have hope...to be 70, dressing up to go out on a date, and necking in our sweetheart's car. Sweet, yes but also a little gross.

I love that they don't give a hoot and are enjoying themselves...who cares what us youngins think? When we're that age we'll be wishing we still had it lol. By the by, he was back yesterday :)

sweet sundays: Happy Easter :)

I love fresh flowers

If you celebrate, I wish you a wonderful weekend. Let's not focus on technicalities, we don't know when He died and was resurrected BUT we know he did and that's what really matters in terms of our salvation.

This weekend a group at my church sang this Kurt Carr song and it was a blessing. Hope you find time to click and enjoy.

Oh, yea. I embraced the yellow. This dress will def make another debut this spring/summer. Thanks Vicky for the prod lol.

girly fridays: hodge podge

I haven't been to the gym. Therefore, I feel fat. Next week is redemption week.

Then, I've tried 2 masks. Let me review:

1. Avocado & Honey - easy to make, but don't make too much. It goes bad. Easy to apply and smells great.

2. Oatmeal, milk, egg yolk, aloe vera, honey, lemon juice - does NOT stay on my face. I am not sure what consistency would work. I had to cover my face with a warm rag to have it stay. I may not cook the oatmeal in milk next time. I think if it were raw and in the honey it wouldn't fall off my face. I'm gonna nix the egg yolk and lemon juice from newer versions of this mask.

These are the 2 that will remain in rotation for awhile.

My choir sings tomorrow. We always wear full black when we do - it's just easier. However, it being the Easter season, we are wearing pastels. I do not like pastel colors. Actually, they are sometimes acceptable. On babies. Otherwise, yuck. So now I have my first yellow dress. Guess this is not so girly friday...girls are supposed to like these colors. I like my colors vibrant or moody, not milked out. & I think yellow is my least favorite color (real color, that is...pastels are in a different category and ones like mint and lavender def take the cake for worst colors - although I must say they are pretty awesome scents).

Speechless

Have you been watching/reading the news?

Health Reform Takes Angry, Violent Turn - barbaric...I guess democracy is only for a select segment of the population. Here's more.

What exactly are they so violently angry about?

->That insurance companies can no longer deny coverage to children due to preexisting conditions?

->That we would dare spend $940 billion to cover 32 million uncovered Americans (largely the working poor and lower class, or is it that we think the uninsured are majority homeless and bums?) who we currently pay for ANYWAY via safety net or higher premiums at higher costs?

->Is it upsetting that promoting the proper use of the health care system (preventive care) will reduce high cost emergency room visits?

->Maybe it is the additional dental coverage? Missing work and school due to dental pain makes perfect sense in a developed nation.

->Oooo, I know. It is the tax hike to the insurance companies offering the super pricey Cadillac plans! Which, by the way has been revised. Or maybe the increased Medicare takes on families making more than $250,000. & don't you for a second think that I don't care because that won't affect me. I plan for it to affect me (sooner than later hopefully).

->Maybe they're upset that kids in school can now have access to medical insurance via their parents till 26...this group is generally the healthiest, lowest costing group to cover.

->Does anyone realize that this bill does not extend coverage to illegal aliens OR change any abortion payment laws/regulations currently in place? States can choose to ban abortion in the health insurance exchanges, and individuals purchasing insurance via the exchanges will have to make their own choice (oh, now I'm gonna get struck by lightening since God doesn't permit free will) regarding abortions & will have to fund it via personal finances.

Sources:

House passes health care bill

Obama signs health care 'fixes' bill

HR 3590 - the actual bill

I get that some people don't like the bill. Everyone has a right to their opinion and they should be able to say that they don't like it BUT what's with the violence? threats? I am pretty confident that anyone threatening lives and shooting buildings up over this are idiots to the nth degree. This is the same system that's been working since 1776. As is blatantly obvious, it doesn't always work well. But if the opinion is that it isn't working, I don't think we should resort to barbarism. There is no reason for us all to look wild and stupid.

I hate to sound like I think this bill is coming up daisies, because it isn't. It is going to cost money, and require adjustment. At the moment I'm a broke grad student whose co-pay is on a steady increase, and whose benefits are on the decrease BUT there is something known as gross and net benefit. I would rather a net benefit.

Anyway, let's have a wooooosah moment and think of better times.

Oh, happy April Fool's...how apropos